inert

I really don't understand why I can't get my body to do... well, anything at all. Besides noodle around on the computer. And do absolutely nothing useful with that.

I'm tired.

FINE I'LL POST SOME CRAP HERE

I'm alive. Just letting you know. Sorry I suck at Facebook and Blogger. I'm getting another blog up soon, don't worry. As in my website that's been like, not up forever. Sorry no pictures still. Yeah. I kinda suck.

Recent developments: Broke my camera, which is sad. Getting better (slowly) at this thing called the Chinese language. Trying to work out more so maybe my sleep cycle will regulate itself. I still love public transit adventures, and the fact that my independent/dulibaogao/dulizaogao topic is basically ON public transit adventures (and urban development and planning in Beijing) means I get to have a lot of them. I have to talk to various bus drivers tomorrow. Fun. (also, I think the fact that I know how to say "mixed-use development" and "multiple modes of public transportation in a long-range plan" in Chinese is... if not completely geeky, also kinda cool.)

I wish I was there more often for the people I care about. I'm making attempts to do that. Hard when I'm all the way in China, though.

I really should get to bed.

i swear i'll write more

I PROMISE.

<3, nitt.

overwhelmed much

If I ever existed in a state where I was not overwhelmed, I think that'd be a momentous occasion.

ERRRRGH

it's been way too damn long

I should be writing about a study abroad opportunity, doing a website, doing something, but I can't stop thinking and I need a place to write it all out. Hey blog. Here you go.

I'm more than halfway through my time here and that's really scary. I don't know. I don't want to leave. This place has done more for me than I could ever imagine. Being around people who care about me has been awesome, and honestly, I don't know what's in store for me in the future. I just kind of want to freeze time where I am right now. I have too much to do, but through it all, I'm seeing the beauty in this situation. Or trying very hard to.

I'm going to try to compress all my thoughts into one thing here:
- I need to finish all my work, so I'm gonna get off of this soon--and that's no different from usual. I have too much work to just sit back and enjoy my life sometimes. I don't know if I like being this busy all the time. Actually, I do. The answer is obviously no.
- I'm really worried about a friend of mine--but that's no different from usual. I just want you to believe in yourself because you're so amazing and I want you to see that. I pick my friends carefully and I wouldn't be friends with you otherwise. Not like you read this anyways, but true all the same.
- Squawk. LAWLZ. My phone has seen so much use lately. That's really out of the ordinary. Maybe I'm finally softening up. Whatev that means. Muahaha.
- Rawwwwr rawwwwr panda.
- Yes, I'm about the most coherent person you'll ever meet. Ain't that the truth.
- I don't know how much I want to deal with you.
- I wish I could just enjoy myself more. Is that such a crime? Responsibility is a bit much for what I can really do at the moment.

Freakin' hell, this sounds so schizoid. That is my mindstate, I guess.

i just experienced democracy

Nothing can really compare to being at the convention.

Sure, there's tons of sleepless nights, crazy-hack audiovisual stuff (on my end, anyways), and a ridiculous amount of WTF going on. ALL THE TIME.

It's a crazy thing, though. And it's amazing to see so many people, believing in what's going on, and wanting to make change. I think it's crazy.

Of course, through working the convention, you definitely see that change isn't easy--nothing worth it ever is.

To be continued.

after a long hiatus

I am going to write in this again.

So much, so much stuff has freakin' happened and I haven't catalogued any of it, and knowing my really crap-ass memory, I should really really try to remember it.

Suffice to say, I have kick-ass friends. I am freakin' lucky. And there's nothing like a conversation with a good friend that re-energizes me.

And I will be going to the Democratic National Convention next week.

What the hell.

Things are going so well. I'm really happy.